Inviting Neuroplasticity Part 1

I used to be able to write and speak easily and eloquently.
It was effortless and actually really enjoyable. So was thinking.
No longer. Now those are challenging and frustrating - writing the most (ironic that I recently I chose to begin a blog).
At times, I feel that that ease of cognitive function is one of the things I miss the most from my life before MCS.

My cognitive symptoms/challenges (I don't like the words 'dysfunction' or 'limitations' even if they are true) are by far the worst during or after an exposure but there is a certain level of difficulty I experience all of the time. I have not had a neurological assessment, SPECT scan or MRI and I have no idea if I have 'brain damage'. I don't really care to know. I know my brain works differently than it used to as far as cognition is concerned. Maybe certain neural 'pathways' or areas are damaged or blocked.

I used to think, write, speak and communicate at a certain 'level' and now I do all of those things at a far lower level... yet still high enough that I am painfully aware of all that I have lost. I don't feel I'm expressing this well. It is a deep grief and a daily frustration - especially when I have all sorts of ideas and viewpoints that I would love to be sharing in this blog.

For inspiration and hope, I look to stroke patients and patients with various types of brain injury. Among them are people who have relearned far beyond what anyone predicted they could.
Our brains are miraculous, amazing things.
Neuroplasticity - the ability of the brain to 'rewire' itself after damage (or more scientifically: the process by which neurons create new connections among themselves) - is itself a wonderful, exciting thing. It is now known that activity in the brain that is associated with a specific action or function can actually move to a different area in the brain!
I imagine a horde of happy little neurons coming to the place that they normally 'cross the river' only to find the bridge is missing. Instead of giving up, they decide to actually build a new bridge! A bit cheesy but inspiring.

The mind-body connection is not well understood yet but many health care professionals accept that it does exist and can greatly effect the outcome of injuries, illness and disease.

With this in mind, I have decided to try regularly talking to my brain(when I remember). Yes, this may sound 'crazy' but I figure I have nothing to lose (unless I talk to it in public :)!

I am going to invite my brain to heal, let it know that I love it, that I honour and cherish it and marvel at how amazing it is! I'll tell it that I'm so glad it exists, and that I trust it to find new ways to communicate. I'll let it know what I want - to communicate easily and well - and tell it that I will be open to whatever ways it can provide.

My old, 'normal' ways of thinking, writing and speaking simply aren't working well for me anymore. When I try to use them, I get totally jumbled up, confused and frustrated. It is doing me no good to keep holding onto those old ways. So I will try to let them go to make space for new ones.

To Do List: Send love and encouragement to my brain

Photo Credit: Casey Hodge